Instagram is one place where I have been documenting my food experiements, sharing moments from our life,my personal love for tamil movies etc. I have always felt a connection with my followers there irrespective of it being just another social media platform. There is this close knit of people who have been following me for a long time, who have shared their personal stories with me, who have been constantly cheering me whenever I feel low and I can go on and on about that platform. I never thought I could go on without posting anything for close to 10-12 weeks. Suddenly I felt the feed was becoming too overwhelming for me. I wanted to get off from the scrolling addiction & to calm down a bit, to take a pause. When everything goes well in your life Insta is a great place to just gaze around, take inspirations, keep on scrolling and be there endlessly watching people’s life go by. BUT when you aren’t in the right mood it pulls you down & makes you feel unnecessarily guilty for not doing much & sometimes insignificant too.
Though your mind knows that you can’t be a recipe developer creating new posts after new post everyday, a DIY specialist, a Mom who engages different activities for her kid, a fitness enthusiast eating nutritious food all meals a day, have great skin & hair, be someone who balances career & personal life so well all at once. While writing this I suddenly remembered Bhagyaraj’s tamil movie Rasukutti movie where he takes pics dressed up as a lawyer, doctor & shows off his “skills” in his living room😃 It is humanely impossible to excel in various fields..We need to keep reiterating to ourselves that these are 10 different people doing 10 different things. We need to keep asking ourselves “What do we really want?” The virtual world and the real world are so intertwined these days and knowingly or unknowingly we are losing clarity on what we really want and at times it is leaning more towards wanting something because we see others owing in it, we see others succeed in a particular way and we try to blindly follow the same path. This meme sums up well my thoughts when scrolling through IG 😝😬
An App or a Social Media platform can’t determine our self-worth,it can’t be an yard stick for measuring our happiness. When we are going through a personal low phase or even otherwise it is ok to unfollow, block, mute or ignore their profile (including mine) which acts as a triggering point for us. This is not disrespectful to any content creators. They do have their own share of struggles which we don’t know. What we see is only 10% of their lives. However taking a break, uninstalling Apps, limiting screen time, filtering the type of content we consume definitely helps in reducing our anxiety, changing our mindset. More than ever I feel this is the time we need to give importance to our personal lives than the virtual ones.I know most of us are aware of this small uncertain bubble. This is just a reminder for those people who are struggling to find a balance between the two.
In case if you are wondering why am I writing all this now?
I felt it is as important as to document my fear, insecurities, vulnerabilities, anxiety and various other feelings along with other general posts that I usually share here.
When this whole news about Covid started I too assumed it is going to be just another flu, it won’t have that much impact in our lives etc. But slowly it started occupying our minds/life 24*7.Adding to that Shiva being diabetic had made me even more anxious in the initial weeks. Whenever I read information regarding how it affects people with pre-existing conditions gave me sleepless nights. Though his levels are under control and we are taking supplements, precautions etc the unknown feeling of helplessness just didn’t go away. Thinking about Parents back home, friends & relatives who don’t have the luxury to work from home, friends who even lost their jobs and witnessing some unfortunate incidents in our close circle made me realize how fragile this life is and how it can turn upside down within split seconds. Irrespective of wherever live the uncertainity remains the same. However we can’t stress over things that aren’t under our control. What matters right now is living the moment, living in present, trying to be safe & cautious as possible.
Our life need not be one of those inspiring stories we hear in TED Talks, our progress need not be in the same graph as others. Every small progress is still a progress.Being content with whatever you have doesn’t mean that you are passion-less or Goal-less. Right now being grateful for whatever we have (be it a job, family, close group of friends to share your joys, good health etc) and trying to stay sane without breaking down to pressure is really important.
Finding peace in this Chaos isn’t easy. You are not alone. However let us try and be Positive with a hope that things will get better soon. Everyday make it a point to spend sometime in doing something which keeps you internally happy. It could be a workout, mediation, praying, art journal, reading, jogging/walking or whatever hobbies you love. Let us try and help the needy through charity or through trusted sources. Let us all hope & pray that world heals soon from this. Sending love & good vibes to you all ✨✨
